NewscomaGot A Two-Pack Habit And A Motel Tan

Things evolve. They change.

I used to be 21. That was 20 years ago. I’m a bit older now, there is some gray sprinkling my hair, and I used to be very blonde but now my hair is a weird “otherworld color” that defies explanation.

Twenty years ago, Ronald Reagan was president, I’d never heard of Osama Bin Laden,  I was recovering from a nasty car wreck in a **gasp** Fiero when a driver hit me at the corner of West End and Woodmont in Nashville. I had the wreck the weekend that Arnold  Schwarzenegger and Marie Shriver got married (’86) because while I was rehabbing it was the only thing on the tube for an entire weekend.  I had never heard of the Internet. I was more concerned about my social life than I was my professional one.

I was seeking identity and community at 21. At 41, I still seek those things, but I don’t bend and transform into what I think people wanted me to be as I did a couple of decades ago.  Now, I could care less what people think of me. If you dig me, great. If not, umm… go away.
I lived in Nashville, I never had any intention of coming back to Hooterville and life, although not necessarily better or worse, was a bit simpler.

Why am I writing this and pondering on it this hot Friday summer day in July?

Because change is aligned with fear. It’s also peppered with excitement and some joy. Things change.

In this blogging world, I’ve met some truly fine people. I’ve laughed. I like to laugh so that is of the good. I’ve been concerned. While getting to know folks on a non-virtual plane, I worry about the people I’ve met. I’m happy when they do well, and sad when they are having a rough time. At times, blogging has made me want to get out of the comfortable shell of northwest Tennessee and move on. I go through that.

Life evolves. We move forward, take a couple of steps back then take five steps forward. I’m a person that honestly believes in cycles.

We don’t know what is going to be behind the next door, but I’m one of those folks who will willingly open it. Because, as an optimist, change for me is exciting. Hell, I’m terrified of it most of the time but I’m all for “jumping through the open windows.”

I’m contemplative this morning. I feel very much the grown up I avoid everyday of being.

And with all of these rambling reflections this morning, go here.