Mabel For Governor
As you know, politics has gone to the dogs. So, let a dog run the state of Tennessee.
I heard Mark Brown is available. (Mabel says “Call me.)
She doesn’t have a platform. She don’t need no stinking platform. And her campaign is sponsored by a bar.
And she listens. This is of the good, my friends. And she’s run for president.
Winner, I’m telling you.
Fantastic. Simply fantastic.
You’ve got my vote, ma’am. And it didn’t cost you a penny!
She certainly dresses the part, but my sources are telling me Mabel is specist and won’t quit her dog-only club. Can you confirm?
She will be adding cats, dogs and ferrets to her campaign team. And as she has never been to a dog only club, she’s safe.
Now strip clubs are an entirely different story.
She’s wearing Lamar’s trademark shirt! I love it.
I still want a bumper sticker!!!
Lauren and I say GO MABEL! We will have to arrange, if possible, a visit to Drinking Liberally!
Mabel needs a political consultant. For instance, the shirt is sooooooooo “Lamar.”
She should be in pastels.
Now strip clubs are an entirely different story.
Mabel, the canine cultural equivalent of Margaret Mead, has simply observed the result of our patriarchal society’s insistence on linking women’s intrinsic value as humans to their ability to hump a pole in stilettos. Her findings will enable her to seek funding for and propose new hard-hitting legislation to ensure all mommas are able to feed their pups, regardless of the size of their teats.
Tune in later for her platform planks on cleaning up after yourself and not going in somebody else’s yard. And clean water.
;0D
Hahahaha!
I can dig it.
…Now that I think about it, when is the Goobernatorial debate? I wanna see our candidate wipe her tushy with the rest of the field.