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Giant Grasshoppers Plague My Mondays

April 2, 2012 - Author: newscoma - Comments are closed

Well, it’s Monday which means the weekly banishing from my apartment. Part of living in an apartment the size of a shoebox is there is one perk and that is they clean it. I’m not complaining about that in the least, it’s just that I’m banished. I am a lowly foot soldier without a country.

It’s like Game of Thrones, I’m thrown out of my kingdom for a few minutes. Of course, I have not been beheaded so there is an upside. (R.I.P. Ned Stark.) It’s not too bad other than crossing Old Hickory Blvd, which honestly is like a game of Frogger. Let’s just say I’ve won thus far but I’m hoping to keep a high score. (At least until my car gets here.) Squirrelly has a new job and so I’m on my own.

I spent most of the morning talking about this weekend’s events on the phone before heading out into the death lanes. I swear people speed up. I worry more about hauling my computer with me and it getting damaged than I do of getting hit. Yeah, I’m a strange cat.

With all that said, I’ve been a bit homesick lately. I don’t know why. It happens. I miss my sister, my nieces’ snark, my dad and Mabel.

I think it’s because I’ve been a little bit sick for the past few weeks. Allergies moved into a cold, the cold moved into some sort of wicked virus and now I just feel grody.  And with the added fact that I saw some sort of grasshopper creature that looked like this doesn’t look good for this summer. (If that photo doesn’t scare the shit out of you, I don’t know what will.)

I imagine this summer that I will be running across Old Hickory Blvd being chased by 25 lb. mosquitos.

That thought doesn’t cheer me up in the least.

Categories: Tennessee