Newscoma

I have a friend who tells this story and yesterday someone confirmed it to be true. First of all kids, meth is bad. It’s gross. You can’t pee it out so the lithium in it oozes out of your skin making folks look pretty terrible. Why anyone would do meth is a mystery to me.

With that said, this story says a lot.

There is this guy I know who owns a carpentry business. He actually can drive me bonkers in about five seconds but he’s not a bad dude and he hires folks at a good wage which endears me to him.

He hired this guy (and subsequently fired him) due to his meth problem.

He told me this guy comes wailing into the parking lot of their job site and starts screaming that his girlfriend was having a heart attack. Of course, she was in the car. Every time I have a heart attack, I make sure that I don’t go directly to the hospital and I head to work to announce my problem, but that’s neither here nor there.

His “old lady” was sitting in the passenger seat cradling a cooked pork chop and screaming “My baby! My BAYBEE!”

A couple of days later, meth dude was canned.

Of course this is tragic but it’s funny as well. If I ever start cradling a cooked pork chop, please shoot me in the head.

On another note of my limited intelligence, I used to work in a battered women’s shelter and we had to search bags that came in. I found a ziploc in one woman’s bag that I thought had dirty white aquarium gravel in it.

Let’s just say I learned that day that crack and aquarium gravel look very similar. Silly me.

Needless to say, meth is yucky.

Sarah Palin is not made of china. Joe Biden, and yes he’s the gaffe king, is not made of china either for that matter.

I’m going to get a bit feminist on you right now. Treat Palin and Biden the same. If softballs are lobbed tonight, then I’m going to be one peed-off woman.  The debate about this alone is infuriating because I keep reading how Biden shouldn’t “bully” Palin.

Biden and Palin just need to debate. The end.

She’s a growed up woman, as my sister Homer would say. Treat her as a vice-presidential pick and move on with it. She deserves to be treated as a candidate. To say that Biden doesn’t need to go on the offensive is absolutely ridiculous. Biden has as much, if not more, to lose as well.

I have no idea why I watch the news as my blood pressure just rises and rises.

Why am I writing this? I run a business with several employees. I have to put on my big-girl panties everyday and deal with the realities that people depend on me to make good, solid decisions. It has nothing to do with the fact that I’m a woman. I manage a business which has no gender involved when it comes to day-to-day operations. My bi-monthly check doesn’t say “WOMAN” on it.

So that ticks me off that this is being talked about. I wonder what time tomorrow the media will tell us which designer’s clothes she wore. Hillary Clinton and Sarah Palin both, and I say both, have done a lot for women in having to deal with so much mainstream media crap.

On the other hand, the die is cast. Democrats will claim Biden the winner. Republicans will claim Palin the winner and the debate isn’t for another 11 hours.

I’m watching the newsers this morning and they are talking about how both candidates have “lowered expectations” regarding this debate.

Guys, don’t buy it. This is an old political trick that needs to be retired effective now. What kind of BS is this?

The American people deserve a debate and not a public relations stunt.

Just call me Cranky McComa.

Eleanor Roosevelt said “Nobody can make you feel inferior without your permission.”

I love that statement.

I do.

I know quite a few people that act like the world is out to get them and suck the oxygen out of the room when they enter it. I have felt that way before myself during down periods. Yes, we run into brick walls sometimes. We deal with unpleasant people who build themselves up by breaking others down.

Why is this on my mind this morning? I think it’s because, as I guess you can see by the changes on this blog, that I’m undergoing a transformation. And I’ve tried to surround myself with people who are comfortable in their own skin and who are not only empowered but empowering.

I get tired of people thinking they aren’t good enough, because THEY ARE.

This line of thought started this morning when I was talking to Homer about the incident last week. We were discussing, after a I did a bit of digging, that this has happened to other children and after a bit of raising hell, I think it will be dealt with appropriately.

Everything has a root system. I feel like everything is connected in some form or another. It’s my way.

But the difference of me being a woman who turns 43 years old in three weeks and a child is that I have learned through years of stops and starts that Roosevelt was right. Children don’t know these lessons unless they are taught them but it’s also a matter of just living.

My mother, the wise sage that she was, used to say “Never give someone not worthy free room and board in your head.”

Because our heads lie to us sometimes. So, what do we do?

Well, we learn that we are human. That we are capable of forgiving ourselves for mistakes we make. That no one else is responsible for our state of mind except ourselves.

Growing older is a wonderful thing, really. I’ve learned that if other people are talking about me, then they are giving someone else a break. I even make up rumors about myself sometimes to see how it goes viral in my town just to amuse myself.

You see, the bottom line is that I hope that I can teach my niece that she is not responsible for other people’s asshattery. That she is above that and those people are inconsequential. I tell her that they are fun vampires, sucking the fun out of a room. She has one life. Live it. Do something every day that scares you. She smiles shyly, but I know she is listening.

She is going to be just fine.

Eleanor was right. We have to take ownership of our own psyche.

This is your early morning dose of middle-aged Zen.

And people wonder why I don’t trust our government.

Jeez.

Okay (yes, Ivy, I used the word okay to start a blog post, but honestly I couldn’t start this any other way. I am asking for forgiveness instead of permission. I will be better in the future.)

And, to Sara Clark, I’m using the word fishstick in a way most deserving. I may be an R-rated blog, but I still caters to families. All sorts of families, if you get my drift and I think you do.  Fishstick comes from a Twitter conversation from Friday.

Definition: FISHSTICK: A new slang developed by Sara and I for your use. Think dirty, you’ll get it. Change it around … We will be in the Urban Dictionary in no time.

But I saw this over at Sarah’s blog and I must tell you, I laughed. Maybe I shouldn’t have laughed but I did.

Here’s the background over at The Smoking Gun:

Meet Carlton Davis. The Minnesota man, 26, is facing felony charges for allegedly stealing a cell phone and purse from a woman he mugged on a St. Paul street early Saturday morning. According to police, after the woman turned over her belongings, Davis announced, “Now I’m going to suck your feet.” Which he did ….

Please just go see the picture. Amazingly and creepily disgusting yet I could not look away for it’s unique oddity.

The Asshat award goes to Davis, who committed a crime and then did some weird toelicking thing that was completely and atrociously out of line.

The mug shot, well if that doesn’t rehabilitate him, I don’t know what will.

What a Fishstick.

Sometimes, I’ll admit, I don’t think about things like this. And then when I read it, I’m all “What the hell?”

You see, I didn’t see that O.J. Simpson being arrested in Las Vegas could be an economic cash cow.

From Market Watch

2,000 journalists at $150 a night for 28 nights$8.4 million2,000 journalists at $100 a day for food for 28 days
(They can eat at the buffets to save)$5.6 million

2,000 journalists at $40 a day for cars for 28 days $2.24 million

2,000 journalists at $1,000 for plane tickets $2 million

Total$18.24 million

And that doesn’t include legal fees, parking fees, the pretrial motion coverage, the appeals, the costs to Clark County, the police overtime, the studio rentals, the foreign press coverage and so forth.

If the case drags on and on, or if interest really begins to take off, the number of journalists involved could easily double and push the coverage costs alone well clear of $50 million.

Insane, but most likely accurate.

Investigators questioned O.J. Simpson and named him a suspect Friday in a break-in at a casino hotel room involving sports memorabilia.

Dear Mr. Simpson,

Please sort of just go away. I liked you in The Towering Inferno, but since then your career and your, ummm, scandals have made me grow very weary of you.

Just saying,

Newscoma

Ted Haggard. Sen. Larry Craig.

It’s really on the lines of what Sharon Cobb said. It’s the hypocrisy. Both men said one thing and did another. They made such broad, sweeping statements, and then turned around and did what they had damned.

You see, Craig was legislating morality. It was something he couldn’t live up to himself but he expected others to be held a different level. Voters have no patience for hypocrisy. They just don’t.

The got caught. Frank at Left of the Dial reports Haggard is still begging for money.
I don’t have any sympathy for either one of them. Southern Beale has a breakdown on Craig’s voting record. He plead guilty, and returned to the airport before he plead out. He can’t use the excuse that he didn’t know what he was doing.

Because, he did.

From CNN this morning:

“Let me be clear: I am not gay and never have been,” said Craig, who has aligned himself with conservative groups who oppose gay rights.

With his wife by his side, Craig said he is the victim of a “witch hunt” conducted by the Idaho Statesman newspaper.

“In pleading guilty, I overreacted in Minneapolis, because of the stress of the Idaho Statesman’s investigation and the rumors it has fueled around Idaho,” he said. “Again, that overreaction was a mistake, and I apologize for my misjudgment.”

But Craig said this when he entered his guilty plea as part of his petition.

Craig paid a $500 fine when he entered his guilty plea in Hennepin County Municipal Court in Bloomington, Minnesota, according to state criminal records.

In his petition to enter a guilty plea, Craig acknowledged that he “engaged in (physical) conduct which I knew or should have known tended to arouse alarm or resentment.” (my emphasis)

It appears its the media’s fault once again. (snark) I’m calling B.S.

So, I say this. Sen. Craig, no one is saying that you are a homosexual although your actions are pretty bizarre. We are saying that you are a hypocrite and that you lied.  Gay has nothing to do with it, it just happens to be the tool that got you a cushy gig with Mitt Romney and it was the button you pushed.

Gay is not a dirty word, which you are making it here.

Now stop it, own what happened, quit blaming everyone else and let’s all move forward.

This is bizarre as a newsroom crew reenacts Sen. Larry Craig and the officer in the Minnesota Mayhem Sex Scandal.

H/T to Scratchy Throat

I was reading CNN this morning Sen. Larry Craig of Idaho pleading guilty to a misdeameanor charge stemming from “lewd behavior” in the Minneapolis airport.

Squirrel Queen, of course commented, that what happens in Minneapolis doesn’t stay in Minneapolis. I wholeheartedly agree. Sen. Craig should have picked a better place to roost, if you ask me, but you didn’t.

The story is a “good ‘un” as we say here in Hooterville.

According to Roll Call, the arresting officer alleged that Craig lingered outside a rest room stall where the officer was sitting, then entered the stall next door and blocked the door with his luggage.

According to the arrest report cited by Roll Call, Craig tapped his right foot, which the officer said he recognized “as a signal used by persons wishing to engage in lewd conduct.”

The report alleges Craig then touched the officer’s foot with his foot and the senator “proceeded to swipe his hand under the stall divider several times,” according to Roll Call.

At that point, the officer said he put his police identification down by the floor so Craig could see it and informed the senator that he was under arrest, before any sexual contact took place.

Squirrel Queen, always the comedian, said Sen. Craig must be a fan of sturdy shoes.

Now, I have no idea about bathroom etiquette in situations like this. Is there a toe-tapping policy that must be adhered to? Just imagine when the officer laid his badge down. The officer was “sitting” so, well, you know…  I wouldn’t want to be interrupted either.

The senator did plead guilty although he denies it.

This is a comedy for the ages.

Better than According to Jim, I gotta tell you.

Dear Washington White House Folks and Private Companies,

You can spy on me if you want. I will go ahead and tell you about myself and then you can go check it out.

• I have four dogs: Mabel, Duff, Kirby and Jura. Jura was named after Scotch. Yeah, I know. Sue me.
• I like mystical things.
• I think Ding Dongs are the grossest yet most wonderful food ever invented other than pickled okra. I buy them both.
• I watch Reality Television. I think they should do a show on the president. I am sure it would be entertaining.
• I make mistakes. It’s a human thing. Mistakes, I repeat, were made.
• I like Bass Beer and Miller Lite when I cannot find Bass Beer. I don’t like Coors Light. Don’t tell Lee. I do think the mountains that change colors on the bottle to indicate when it’s cold and hot is cool. The German taught me this on Saturday. The German is also really cool.
• I hate it when people misunderstand me. Especially when I’m trying to do what I perceive is the right thing.
• I do not like Joe Leiberman. I realize he’s your friend these days.
• My cellphone officially bit the dust today. You don’t have to monitor me as I will be on my niece’s phone as I really don’t have the do-re-mi to go and get the phone I want. Please, it was me on this 11 yr. old’s phone if you hear anything suspicious.
• Elvis Impersonators seeing a woman back into my car was not a fine, sweet tale. IT WAS TRUE.
• I like men with long hair that dangles in their face.
• Cave Crickets could be the next weapon of mass destruction if I, indeed, was your enemy.

So there you go.

I miss the government that my grandfather loved. And he was a Republican,

Yours truly,

Newscoma